Sunday, October 28, 2007

So i cut and pasted this from an email

to Leina. Ergo: the first comment will be Leina, because Leina is ALWAYS THE FIRST COMMENT, and it will be something along the lines of "hey, this is what you emailed to me!"

I am psychic.

Anyway. On the topic of sorority hazing.

See there's no "hazing" because we all signed a pledge card that said we are doing everything "voluntarily."

stuff I have done "voluntarily"

1. Been kidnapped, dressed as a unicorn, driven to the godforsaken middle of nowhere while listening to german techno dubbed over an audiobook of The Picture of Dorian Gray, and made to play blindfolded leapfrog while tied in a garbage bag

2. Drank (non-alcoholic beverages only, OF COURSE) out of a ten year old boot that has never been washed and has previously undiscovered life forms growing in the inside.

3. I am currently wearing a wrist band that says ΣΔ and I am never allowed to take it off until I die, or risk more shoebeers I MEAN NONALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES. In shoes.

4. Jello-wrestled unattractive frat boys

5. Boatraced more times than I care to admit

6. Went to bail the ΣΔ alumni out of jail when they got arrested over homecoming...stupid alums.

7. Been thrown out of a volleyball game thanks to The Girl Who Feels That Flashing The Whole Campus Is a Public Service's tendency to A) Live up to her name, and B) thinks it's funny to encourage the pledges to explore the numerous ways in which rival school's names can be creatively related to various parts of the male anatomy.

8. I'm also currently carrying a hip pack with ducks on it that I am also never allowed to take off until I die, and I must have a full supply of chocolate and fruit snacks inside in case any sisters see me and want some.

9. Got sent to food court at 12:58a.m. (they close at 1) to get mozz sticks for The Girl Who Feels That Flashing The Whole Campus Is a Public Service OR ELSE.

10. CLEANED. THE BASEMENT. You don't want to know.

You know, this should be a blog post.

And then it was.

8 comments:

said...

are you sure you're allowed to tell us that?

said...

HA! my comment was not "hey, this is what you emailed me" because i have not checked my mail yet! but if i did...that is what my comment would be

said...

what is boat racing?? my sorority roommate says that your pledging sounds similar to the ATX girls' pledging...ATX = our hardcore, #1 sorority that has the hardest pledging. but there are only parts of yours that are like that, she said

said...

wenxi wants to know how many ppl are in you pledge class, if you have a pledge name, and she empathizes with you and promises you will look fondly back on the memories

said...

do i come up as spam?

said...

you still have not fixed your bunny link

heh heh, i surpassed your wildest dreams...i am you first SIX comments, bitch!! i win :) and i have no life *tear*

me said...

Leina--you don't come up as spam, I marked you as an exception :D

I killed the bunny, which is why it doesn't show up. *eeeeeeevil*

said...

NYOOOOO!! WHY DID YOU KILL IT??