Sunday, September 30, 2007

I stalk people

But you all already knew that. And if you didn't, well, this just became awkward.

Anyway. Because I'm lazy, I prefer to confine to my stalking to that which can done over the internet, i.e. IP tracing those of you reading. Yo.

A brief rundown--

Most frequent visitor: someone from Hamilton.edu. I, of course, have NO IDEA who this is. *strokes chin in perplexed fashion, raises eyebrow*

Visiting blog at oddest hours of the morning: True, she has some help because of the time difference, but the random visits at 4am PST propelled her to first, it's She Who Wields The Awesome Hulk Hands of POWER!

Oddest random visitor: Someone whose IP was identified as "Department of Homeland Security." Please note that I would like to be placed in the "Disturbing, yet HARMLESS category." Thank you!

Second most disturbing keyword search: "Caffeinegirl livejournal." Dammit people, I told you NOT to go look at the LJ? What am I going to do with you? *shake head*

Most disturbing keyword search : "Teenage girl blow me"...RIGHT. MOVING ON.

Funniest revelation during stalking: Ask.com has classified this as an "Adult website." Heh.

Most common ISP: comcast.net. Represent!

The reason I am writing this post, which is why it is very forced and much less funny than usual: I just realized that I'm still getting hits from optonline.net in Connecticut. Now, any time I see that, I freak out for a second, because my PARENTS are in Connecticut, using optonline. Then usually I calm down and realize that someone I know is home in Darien, also using optonline. But.

WE'RE ALL AT COLLEGE NOW.

I ran a trace, and the geographic area (thanks, shitty free utilities) is PROBABLY in Stamford. Unfortunately, my house is close enough to Stamford that I can't rule it out.

Therefore. I desperately need an answer to the following questions:

1. Has anyone been home / in Stamford lately?

2. Did anyone give the blog address to someone in Stamford / Darien?

3. Did anyone think about the blog while someone from Stamford could have been in the area and picked it up with their latent telepathic abilities?

4. Is there a random person around who I don't know?

5. KELLY! Could it be you? Please be you!

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF CHEESE EMAIL ME: caffeinegirl47@gmail.com if you know the answer!

And, if, horror of horrors, it is my parents: Hi! What's up? This is, of course, a complete work of fiction! Hahahaha...good one, right? Actually, this isn't even caffeinegirl writing this! It's The Awesome Roommate! I was bored, in Chicago, on my off-term! Caffeinegirl gave me her password. She's in the library, diligently studying!

Seriously.


/splort

4 comments:

Leina said...

"Teenage girl blow me"
WHY DO YOU COME UP WHEN PEOPLE SEARCH THIS?? I think I deserve a reward for coming up most often :D

anyway, minnis might have found your blog...she has one

Leina said...

anyway, this is an online blog..isn't the whole point that random people and people you know read this blog?? IT'S OK IF YOUR PARENTS READ IT! but I'm not sure if it's them

Abby said...

it's my mother, dude! she thinks you're the funniest thing since... uh, something really funny. don't worry.

Sayuri said...

wooooooooooooooooooow. that's an interesting list of facts! but yes, i do check your blog at weird hours in the morning *SHAME*. BUT IT'S THE BEST TIME! and yeah. it's all good. AND HULK HANDS OF POWER! shall be in action again soon, since i restocked up on AAA batteries, mwa ha ha.